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MYTH: MANAGERS SHOULD MANAGE THEMSELVES

The guy who gets the least feedback in any company is not the mailboy - it's the chief executive officer. Does he need the least? (Does buy low mean sell high?) Pity the poor CEO! There he sits in the executive suite trying to figure out ways to sincerely reinforce dozens or hundreds of people who work under him. But who reinforces the boss? In football, the joke is that the coach gets constant feedback, most of it in the form of eleven guys running around the field with his paycheck.

Believe it or not, the president of one of America's best-known financial services institutions once told me, "Fran, I've been here for two years now, and I still don't know how I'm doing. Nobody ever tells me."

When your boss does something that helps your business he needs stroking just as much as the lowliest floor-creeper in the company. When he does something for you, don't take him for granted. A lot of people think, "Well, that's his job." But, just like you, he needs to hear it when he  is  doing  something  right.  The problem, of course, is that we are all in awe of our bosses. We think that because the boss has power and money, he must have the whole world by the tail. Because he's my boss, he doesn't need reinforcement.

Nothing could be further from the truth. Roberto Goizueta, chairman of the giant Coca-Cola Company, once described the dilemma of the CEO in America: "The way he is viewed . . . is a curse. . . . The press, employees, shareholders and the public all treat him - perhaps subconsciously - as a god. But if he starts behaving like one, they resent it."

Because we put the mighty CEO on such an out-of-reach pedestal, the boss often doesn't get the feedback and reinforcement he needs from his own subordinates.  Like you, he needs a scoreboard on which to measure his performance.

One of the most common refrains I have heard from top executives over the years is, "I don't really know how well I am doing." Of course the boss has the bottom line and the profit-and-loss sheet to look at, but he also needs to know on a more intimate basis how well he is doing with immediate employees - with you.

Even NFL quarterbacks need reinforcement. Once I threw a key block in a game the Vikings won against the St. Louis Cardinals. During the Monday films I kept waiting for the coach to point out my contribution to that critical play. He praised the linemen and the runners and the water boy and the pom-pom girls, it seemed, but he never mentioned me and my key block.

I went to him after the team meeting and said, "Coach, why didn't you say anything about my block?"

"Fran," he said, "you always give a hundred and fifty percent. You're out there gung-ho all the time. So I just didn't feel that I needed to praise you for it."

"If you ever want me to do it again, you did," I said.

You can't always assume that even your most enthusiastic players are feeling good about themselves. They may give 150 percent, but they need to hear it if you're pleased. And thinking good thoughts about that member of your team is not enough - nobody can read your mind!

It may even inspire the players to praise the boss.

FACT: Don't be afraid of the boss - he needs you too.

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