Written, compiled, and edited by Frederick Mann - started: 4/11/04 - last update: 4/14/04 - Work-in-progress
This book is primarily about making money on the Internet. I start off by using golf as an analogy to make an important point. Most human activities (work, relationships, finances, sports, games, etc.) involve an "Inner Game" ("Factor IG") and an "Outer Game" ("Factor OG"). Most people trying to succeed at something, focus on how to do it. There are thousands of "How to" books -- that deal almost exclusively with Factor OG. A "How to Play Golf" book typically tells you all about how to grip the club, how to stand and address the ball, how to backswing, how to downswing, the ideal position of your body and the club at impact, how to follow through, etc. It's all about the Outer Game -- Factor OG.
Although it's vital to learn the basics of Factor OG (Outer Game) -- grip, stance, backswing, downswing, etc. -- what if success at golf depends about 5% on Factor OG and about 95% on Factor IG (Inner Game)?
"The cover story of the 1998 August issue of 'Senior Golfer' was, "Why aren't we getting any better?" This well-written article by Nick Mastroni started with, "Something is wrong! Despite all the new technology for balls and clubs; 24 hour golf on television, more instruction videos; more books; more golf schools; more lessons, and in many cases, more practice: handicaps are not any lower than they were 17 years ago." The USGA director of handicaps Kevin O'Connor says, "The average handicap of 16.2 for men, and 26.5 for women, has been the same for 17 years"." -- quoted from 'Golf Swing Secrets... and Lies' by Michael Hebron
"Humans are the only species on earth with the ability to interfere with their own performance. Self-interference is a learned skill; we are not born with it." -- Michael Hebron ('Golf Swing Secrets... and Lies') [highlight added]
"It seems clear that the breakthroughs of the next age must come in the form of advances in our individual and collective abilities to tap existing human capabilities and to overcome the negative internal forces that interfere with their expression." -- W. Timothy Gallwey ('The Inner Game of Golf') [highlight added]
"In 1982, I found 196 books on how to become wealthy. Today there are 976 offered by one online bookseller alone. Two decades ago, I found 497 titles on the subject of success. Today I find over 4,000 ...[Y]ou are soon overwhelmed by the plethora of resources available to help you succeed." -- Mike Hernacki ('The Ultimate Secret to Getting Absolutely Everything You Want')
What if most "how to" (Factor OG) information is relatively useless... until you master Factor IG (the Inner Game)?
What if there are so many "get rich" and "how to become successful" books because they don't work for most people... so they keep on buying more "get rich" and "how to become successful" books with the hope that they'll eventually find something that works?
"The main message is that self-discovery and problem-solving skills are more valuable for learning than someone else's "how to" list... Using a "how to list" is looking outside ourselves for answers, where self-discovery looks inward where long-term learning is born." -- Michael Hebron ('Golf Swing Secrets... and Lies')
The term "Inner Game" (which I call "Factor IG") was coined by W. Timothy Gallwey, author of the books:
There are many people selling information online on how to make money on the Internet. They make the money! However, 95%+ of their customers don't -- because "HOW TO" ISN'T ENOUGH! Factor OG by itself just doesn't cut it, Factor OG doesn't deliver the goods. Factor OG contributes maybe 5% to your success. On the other hand, Factor IG contributes maybe 95% to your success! Talking about baseball, Yogi Berra said: "90% of the game is half mental!" Spectacularly successful basketball coach Geno Auriemma (University of Connecticut) says: "People break down mentally before they break down physically!" ("Mental" = Factor IG; "physical" = Factor OG.)
Consider that you have a master "win-lose switch" in your mind. It's a graduated switch like those used for big direct-current electric motors. Rather than just "on" and "off" settings, it's a graduated switch with eleven settings from "0" to "10." If you set your master switch to "zero," you are completely turned off -- a total loser. If you set your master switch to "ten," you are the complete winner.
How do you move your switch to a higher setting? In the case of the big DC motor, as the switch is turned up, more electricity is supplied and the motor runs faster. How do you turn up your switch, become more energetic, and take more effective action? (Note: If the switch is immediately turned from "0" to "10," the motor will overload and burn out.)
Of course, there isn't just one master switch that measures the extent to which you win or lose in life. You can think in terms of a win-lose switch in every area of your life you care to specify. For example, you can think in terms of your health win-lose switch, your relationship win-lose switch, your Internet money-making win-lose switch, etc.
In each area of life, you can think of your win-lose switch as being a measure of your relative success in that area. Success is winning; failure is losing. The position of your switch depends about 5% on Factor OG and about 95% on Factor IG. Depending on how successful you already are, to move up your switch, focus mostly on Factor IG!
You're reading this presumably because you want to make money on the Internet. If you're already highly successful at earning your living on the Internet, there may be no need for you to read this book. If you have contacts and downline members who are not as successful as you are, you may want to refer them to this website. The purpose here is to help readers "find out where they are" and to provide them with information and guidelines to "upgrade" themselves to a level that enables them to succeed at making money on the Internet.
There's an important difference between humans and animals. There's an aspect in which animals tend to be superior to humans. In general, animals automatically "upgrade" themselves to reach their highest potential. Unfortunately, humans are different in this respect. It requires conscious, deliberate, and persistent effort on our part to upgrade ourselves to reach our full potential.
We humans have powerful minds. We can use our minds to upgrade ourselves. But we can also use our minds to downgrade ourselves. We can use our minds to sabotage our success. We have much more scope to use our minds against ourselves than animals do. How often do animals get unhappy, depressed, or commit suicide? What if 95%+ of people, when it comes to making money online, UNKNOWINGLY use their minds more to sabotage themselves, than they use their minds to succeed?
Maybe the "Hopeless-to-Guru Scale" can help you pinpoint where you are and indicate the kind of actions you might want to take to upgrade yourself.
The Hopeless-to-Guru Scale could be regarded as a "competence scale." Whether you make money on the Internet or not, and how much you make is an indication of your level of competence. The more competent you are, the more money you make. Your competence can be regarded as a combination of Factor IG and Factor OG. Factor IG makes up about 95% of your competence, while Factor OG makes up about 5%.
What I call the "OSTRICH FACTOR" may be most important! The term "ostrich factor" comes from the chapter title "The Denial of Personal Disadvantage Among You, Me, and All the Other Ostriches" (by Crosby, Faye, Ann Pufall, Rebecca Claire Snyder, Marion O'Connell, and Peg Whalen. (1989); Pp.79-99 in 'Gender and Thought: Psychological Perspectives' edited by Mary Crawford, and Margaret Gentry. New York: Springer-Verlag).
A great deal of research has been done to demonstrate that relatively incompetent people tend to overestimate their level of competence. And, the more incompetent people are, the more they tend to overestimate their competence. In general, PEOPLE ARE LESS COMPETENT THAN THEY THINK THEY ARE! In general, PEOPLE TEND TO DENY THEIR DISADVANTAGES! You can read much more about this in #TL10E: THE POWER OF DOING THINGS RIGHT.
What this amounts to is that many people are likely to think that their win-lose switch in some area of their life is at 4, 5, or higher... when a more accurate assessment might be 2 or 3! On the Hopeless-to-Guru Scale, they might think they are at "Level 0 - IMB - Internet-Money Baby (Naive Rat) - Curiosity - WLS=4" or "Level 1 - IMC - Internet-Money Crawler (Clever Rat) - Exploration - WLS=5," when a more accurate assessment would be "Level -2 - IMF - Internet-Money Flake or Wimp (Lame Rat) - Helplessness - WLS=2" or "Level -3 - IMN - Internet-Money Negaholic (Retarded Rat) - Negativity - WLS=1."
Recently a friend emailed me:
"I joined a number of BigBooster programs some years ago and pursued them perhaps not as intelligently or diligently as I should have. Ended up losing my entire investment without making a dime. Discouraging.
I decided I lacked the necessary know-how, drive, persistence or something to make these sorts of programs work. I keep telling myself that I'm no salesman, but every time I "admit" that, it makes me cringe because I realize that I've sold THAT to myself, so I'm a pretty good salesman after all!
I'm a failure at this stuff. I invested and lost enough to sell myself well on my own failure. I suppose what I was looking for was wage slavery. I sold myself on the thought that this is what I needed, this is all I deserved, or this is all I was capable of achieving. It was a good sale. I bought it from somebody I can't really help but trust unconditionally, myself.
So, here I am standing at a diverging road. One path seems more secure, the other I've convinced myself I can't navigate. I think, in this regard, I have to trust you more than I trust myself because I believe I've sold myself on a lie."
My friend -- who probably has an IQ of at least 120, maybe 150 or above! -- as an "Internet money-maker" was probably operating at "Level -1 - IMI - Internet-Money Idiot (Dumb Rat) - Stupidity - WLS=3" or below. Most likely he was using his powerful mind more to sabotage himself than to aid his success.
Based on the interactions I've had with thousands of people trying to make money on the Internet, it seems to me that 95%+ typically operate at the level of "IMI - Internet-Money Idiot (Dumb Rat) - Stupidity" or below.
Let me tell you a secret: The ability to make decisions is an AWESOME POWER! You also have a very powerful subconscious mind. When you make a decision, your subconscious mind will assist you in all kinds of ways (sometimes unexpected and surprising!) to make your decision come true. (My friend, above, may have "decided himself into failure!"
Your ability to make positive decisions may have been compromised or even severely damaged by your "schooling." John Taylor Gatto was named New York City Teacher Of The Year, each year from 1989 to 1991. In 1991 the New York Senate named him State Teacher Of The Year. Gatto confesses to being "the 7-lesson schoolteacher." You can read more about Gatto and his "7 lessons" in "ARE OUR SCHOOLS CONCENTRATION CAMPUSES FOR MIND DESTRUCTION?" Following are the seven lessons (aspects particularly important to the ability to make positive decisions highlighted by me):
According to Gatto, these are the consequences of the seven lessons:
Maybe one of the purposes of "government education" is to reduce individuals' ability to make decisions and to prepare them to become "obedient workers" in factories and offices. When you work in a job, it may be in an environment where you just have to do what you're told to "succeed" (i.e., get paid at the end of the week or month, without getting fired). Your job may never involve any critical decisions on your part, and you may never experience the power of your positive decisions. You may operate in a structure or system where your decisions are largely irrelevant and unwanted.
In trying to make money on the Internet, YOU'RE RESPONSIBLE! It's up to you to make decisions, take actions, and produce results. Although there may a kind of support system or structure, there's no boss standing over you to ensure that you do your work. It's an environment very different from a job. Working in a job can result in getting out of touch with your ability to make positive decisions.
What if outside their jobs, most people actually DECIDE TO FAIL. So, their personal finances and relationships tend to be a mess. Typically, they DON'T KNOW that they decide to fail. But the fact remains: THEY DECIDE TO FAIL. The percentage of people "trying" to make money on the Internet, who decide to fail, is very high -- almost certainly well above 90%!
If you've been operating at "Level -1 - IMI - Internet-Money Idiot (Dumb Rat) - Stupidity - WLS=3," trying to make money on the Internet, it's unlikely that you've had much success. In fact, it's almost impossible to succeed, when you operate at "Level -1" or below. Furthermore, if you've been operating at these minus levels, you certainly have been suffering from UNWANTED CONDITIONS, for example, "negativity," "inability to make money on the Internet," "helplessness," etc.
The best way I know of to overcome such unwanted conditions is Idenics. See also the articles "Idenics: The Most Powerful Reprogramming for Success!" and "Letter from Mike Goldstein..." in WBM#182.
In my experience, well over 90% of people trying to make money on the Internet are doomed to failure, because they operate at:
At these levels, it's virtually impossible to succeed. If you're stuck at any of these levels, you have to DO SOMETHING TO UPGRADE YOURSELF if you want to make money. If you don't upgrade, you won't make money. Simple as that!
If you've been trying to make money online, and you haven't enjoyed the kind of success you expected -- and this probably applies to 95%+ of people -- the chances are that you've been operating in the "region" of Level -4, Level -3, Level -2, and Level -1. As long as you operate at these levels, it's virtually impossible for you to make money. If you're not making money, don't kid yourself that you're operating at a higher level. Remember the "Ostrich Factor!"
Nobody else can motivate you to apply Factor IG to upgrade yourself to higher levels. ONLY YOU CAN MOTIVATE YOURSELF!
One way to motivate yourself is to continue doing the same unworkable things you've been for months or years. Continue doing the same things for another few weeks, months or years. If you continue to fail, come back to this book after a few weeks, months or years, and DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT!
Consider learning a few FACTS ABOUT REALITY:
These are some facts of reality. If you don't believe me, just continue what you've been doing... then come back to this book after a few weeks, months or years, and then DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT!
Another fact of reality is that Actions produce Consequences. If you want to produce certain Consequences (like money flowing into your accounts from online people and programs), then you need to commit yourself to taking the necessarry Actions, whatever they may be. You need to be willing to Do Everything Necessary to Succeed -- and you need to actually DO EVERYTHING NECESSARY TO SUCCEED.
"In order to accomplish something, you must be willing to do whatever it takes to accomplish it." -- Mike Hernacki ('The Ultimate Secret to Getting Absolutely Everything You Want')
While I recommend Hernacki's book, I also need to point out what I consider his most serious error:
"To get absolutely everything you want, you don't have to study anything, meet anyone, go anywhere or do anything in particular."
This quote is from Page 3 of his book. If it were true, it would not be necessary to read the rest of his book! You could stop right there and automatically get "absolutely everything you want!" Hernacki in effect seems to say that success depends 100% on Factor IG and 0% on Factor OG! There's a great deal of "New-Age Nonsense" along the lines of (again quoting Hernacki), "All that matters is what goes on in your head" and, "When you think of having ten million dollars, that money immediately begins making its way toward you." This is absurd! It's true that you have to "fix your head" (Factor IG), but then you have to take the Actions -- DO THE HARD WORK! -- that produce the Consequences you want.Get Inspired and Committed!
Until one is committed, there is hesitancy.
the chance to draw back,
always ineffectiveness concerning all acts of initiative (and creation).
There is one elemental truth,
the ignornance of which kills countless ideas
and splendid plans --
that the moment one definitely commits oneself,
then Providence moves all.
All sorts of things occur to help one
that would never otherwise have occurred.
A whole stream of events issue from the decision,
raising in one's favor all manner of incidents
and meetings and material assistance
which no one could have dreamed would come his or her way.
Whatever you can do or dream, you can begin it.
Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.
Begin it now.
-- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749-1832)
Wake Up Your Powerful Real Self!
"Deep within humans dwell those slumbering powers; powers that would astonish them, that they never dreamed of possessing; forces that would revolutionize their lives if aroused and put into action." -- Orison Marden
"There do exist enquiring minds, which long for the truth of the heart, seek it, strive to solve the problems set by life, try to penetrate to the essence of things and phenomena and to penetrate into themselves. If a man reasons and thinks soundly [Factor IG], no matter which path he follows in solving these problems [Factor OG], he must inevitably arrive back at himself, and begin with the solution of the problem of what he is himself and what his place is in the world around him. For without this knowledge, he will have no focal point in his search. Socrates' words "Know thyself" remain for all those who seek true knowledge and being." -- G. I. Gurdjieff ('Views from the Real World')
In his "Inner Game" books, W. Timothy Gallwey makes a distinction between "Self 1" and "Self 2." Self 1 is an invented or alien self. Self 2 is your natural self. This is similar to Gurdjieff's distinction between "personality" and "essence."
"Death must come before rebirth. But what must die? False confidence in one's own knowledge, self-love and egoism. Our egoism must be broken. We must realize that we are very complicated machines, and so this process of breaking is bound to be a long and difficult task. Before real growth becomes possible, our personality must die." -- G. I. Gurdjieff ('Views from the Real World')
You may have noticed some conversation or chattering going on inside your head. For example, while having a conversation with someone, all kinds of judgmental thoughts go through your mind about what the other person is saying. While listening, you may also be rehearsing what you're going to say next. This is your Self 1 in action.
In tennis there is a typical "Self 1 downward spiral." You hit a poor backhand into the net. Your Self 1 comments in your head, "That was a terrible shot!" After a few more weak backhands, your Self 1 says, "My backhand is terrible!" Not too long after that, the comment becomes, "I'll never be able to play good tennis!" -- or some similar putdown.
The "Self 1 downward spiral" may not stop there. It might be followed with, "I'm too clumsy to be good at any sport." And even, "I'm a worthless person."
Your Self 1 may also be constantly telling you what to do and what not to do. The essence of Self 1 is that it INTERFERES with the powerful abilities of your natural Self 2. Self 1 operates at the negative levels of the Hopeless-to-Guru Scale. To move your win-lose switch toward 10, you need to "kill" your Self 1 and wake up your Self 2.
Gallwey has come up with the formula: Performance = Potential - Interference.
In any area of your life you can improve your performance by reducing interference from your Self 1.
Your Self 2 is your Powerful Real Self or essence. To wake up your Self 2, you may have to "kill" aspects of your Self 1. By "kill" I mean become aware of and UNLEARN a host of more or less unconscious thinking habits designed to keep your Self 1 in control and suppress your Self 2.
Your Self 2 has powerful, natural learning abilities. Your Self 1 may interfere with your natural learning. Much of "formal education" is styled after Self 1 interference and is more of a hindrance than an aid to natural learning. Most humans have largely lost their natural learning abilities -- a big disadvantage! Fortunately, by reducing Self 1 interference, you can recover your natural learning abilities.
If you're trying to make money on the Internet, you may experience interference from your Self 1 in the form of negative comments circulating in your mind. Your Self 1 may be sabotaging you in other ways -- like steering you into making bad decisions.
In all kinds of activities ranging from sports to ordinary communication and to making money on the Internet, there is an Inner Game (Factor IG) and an Outer Game (Factor OG). The Outer Game has to do with hitting the ball. The Inner Game has to do with what goes on in your mind.
By becoming better at the Inner Game, you can greatly improve your Outer Game. If you're not as successful as you would like to be with your Outer Game of making money on the Internet (or anything else), you may want to work on improving your Inner Game.
In my opinion, Gallwey's Inner Game formulation is one of the most important breakthroughs in understanding and improving human Behavior:
Your Self 1 interference may put you at a disadvantage in several areas of your life. Self 1 interference could even cause you huge disadvantages. Gallwey's books include several examples of people dramatically increasing their advantages by becoming aware of and "killing" aspects of their Self 1 (such as compulsive and chronic negativity). Most likely, you'll be able to do the same -- waking up your Powerful Real Self!
Kenneth W. Christian, Ph.D. has written a great book Your Own Worst Enemy: Breaking the Habit of Adult Underachievement. It's so thorough that it almost serves as an encyclopedia of all the ways in which your Self 1 sabotages your success and reduces you to an underachiever. Dr. Christian has gone further and created a comprehensive support system for those who want to upgrade themselves by breaking their underachievement habits:
If at this point, you feel somewhat overwhelmed, dismayed, and discouraged by the huge "Factor IG mountain" you have to climb before you can become successful, I have good news! There's a quick, effective, and efficient way to blast most of the "Self 1 crap" out of your mind. It's called Idenics. See also the articles "Idenics: The Most Powerful Reprogramming for Success!" and "Letter from Mike Goldstein..." in WBM#182
The following is from a testimonial letter I wrote in 1995:
"Idenics is a powerful, straightforward and effective system that addresses an individual's "unwanted conditions" [personal disadvantages or deficiencies] on a one-to-one basis.
About three years ago I experienced Idenics for the first time. I started with a list of about 30 "unwanted conditions" in my life - things I didn't like about myself - mainly fixed and more or less compulsive emotional behaviors.
It took about 35 minutes to handle the first "unwanted condition." The second one took about 15 minutes. I handled each successive "unwanted condition" in less time. It was truly amazing how certain long-standing problems disappeared in minutes!
About nine months after the first few sessions, I had a few more Idenics sessions. There were only a few minor "unwanted conditions" to handle and I handled them very quickly.
Before Idenics I was never particularly successful at anything for very long. Every venture or business I tried to start, failed quickly or never got off the ground. I found it extremely difficult to get others working with me.
Since Idenics all that has changed. Now there are people from all over the world working with me. Hundreds of thousands read my writing. People are changing their lives because of my influence. Companies are being reorganized according to my suggestions. I feel that I've become spectacularly successful and that much greater success is coming in the future!"
You can find the rest of the letter on the Idenics website.
SELF-MOTIVATION (Part 1) by Thomas D. Yarnell, Ph.D., Clinical Psychologist
Copyright 1999 Thomas D. Yarnell, Ph.D. All rights reserved
Successful performance at just about anything requires that you be able to keep yourself motivated. Discouragement and lack of motivation hits everyone at some time or another. The more techniques we have to help us restart our engine or to keep it going when things get tough or boring, the more successful we will be.
Technique To Build Self-Motivation: VISUAL GOALS
Everyone expects to get something for the time and effort they put in doing whatever job they do. Maybe your goal is a new house, a car, a vacation or just a new piece of clothing. Whatever it is that you are working for, make it visual. Cut out pictures that show your goal or that represent your goal in some way.
Tape these pictures to a sheet of poster board and hang it in your home or at work or anyplace you can so you will see it often. Carry a picture with you so you can look at what you are working towards every time you become discouraged or feel like slacking off.
This technique works well for goals that are things we want and also goals that represent physical changes such as losing weight. You can post and carry pictures of the car you want or pictures of Hawaii to represent the vacation you want. You can also post and carry pictures of you when you were slim or at least slimmer than you are. Some of my clients who don't remember ever being slim found that they could cut out pictures from a magazine of someone else who was slim and then paste their face over the face in the picture. After the initial laugh about how silly that looked, they became used to it and found that it worked just as well as the others who had slim pictures of themself.
The more visual and more real you can make the goal, the better it will work at keeping you motivated. One person I know was saving money for a very specific and expensive sports car. He knew it would take awhile before he had the money and he became discouraged often even though he had pictures of the car scattered all over his house and in the car he drove then. To make it more real to him, he and his wife went to the car dealer and took his picture sitting behind the wheel, looking in the trunk and standing next to the car. After posting these pictures, he related that it made it so much more real and much easier to stay on task when he became discouraged.
Technique To Build Self-Motivation: WRITTEN CONTRACTS
Motivational research shows that people who write out what they are going to do are far more successful than people who only tell themselves they will do something. Putting something in writing makes it psychologically more powerful. This is one reason why making written lists helps us stay more organized than just having a mental list. Our society favors written contracts and most of us have grown up knowing that you are supposed to honor written contracts. We can take advantage of this psychological conditioning to help us stay motivated. We can make a contract with ourself.
In the contract, state what you will do, when you will complete the task and what your reward will be once the contract is fulfilled. Read your contract over every morning and every evening before going to bed. If your goals are too small or too large, revise them. You can rewrite your contract as needed but don't make it so easy that it becomes useless as a motivator.
SELF-MOTIVATION (Part 2)
In SELF-MOTIVATION (Part 1) I talked about using "Visual Goals" and "Written Contracts" to help you keep yourself motivated. I know, life should be fun so you wouldn't have to play mind games with yourself to keep yourself motivated. Unfortunately, it just isn't that way much or even most of the time. Here are two more techniques you can use to help keep your battery charged.
Technique To Build Self-Motivation: REWARDS
Everyone likes to be rewarded for doing a good job. We also like being rewarded for just completing something we needed or wanted to do. Unfortunately, there are many times when there is no one else around to pat us on the back for the job we completed. Pats on the back, "good job," "nice work," "thank you" are all essential to being a motivated, productive person. There are many people in positions of authority who do not realize this or who don't care. If this is what's happening to you, you probably already feel discouraged. While rewarding yourself is not as potent as having the reward come from someone else, it can still help you stay motivated, productive and happier than if you received no reinforcement at all.
To make the reward system really work, you must pick rewards that you really want. Large or small, expensive or cheap, if it isn't something you want, it isn't a reward. The size of the reward should also fit the size of the project. Buying a new car because you cleaned the garage is out of the question -- if you know what I mean. Taking an hour to sit and read your favorite mystery novel after completing the task seems more in line.
Technique To Build Self-Motivation: PUT IT IN WRITING
Review the section on written contracts in Part 1. Make a contract with yourself to reward yourself with "X" when you complete whatever project you are working on. How often you reward yourself will depend on how unmotivated you are. If you are feeling unmotivated to do a project, you may contract with yourself to give yourself a reward after each step of the project or after every hour you've worked. If you are motivated to do something, you may wait until it's totally completed before rewarding yourself.
Finally, if you promise yourself a reward, you must give it to yourself and you must take it. Our mind is a fascinating device and it has a huge memory. Make a contract with yourself for a special reward, complete the task but then, don't take the reward. The next time, your mind will recall the broken promise and the contract for a reward will not have the same motivating results as if you had taken and received the reward the last time.
This technique also holds true when you are trying to motivate someone else (spouse, child, friend, employee). Use all the same procedures and you will be able to produce some motivation for the other person. Just make sure the reward is something they want and not something you want.
Technique To Build Self-Motivation: ACT "AS IF"
Many of us have heard the phrase "Smile and things will get better." The psychological truth is that this is true. If you wake up feeling rotten, hating the world, put a smile on your face and some bounce in your step and pretty soon, you will start feeling better. Most people know that our body language tells a lot about our mood. What most people don't know is that, because of this relationship, you can use your body language to change your mood and how you feel about yourself. If you start acting confident (stand straight, head high, shoulders back, a smile on your face and walk crisply) even though you feel discouraged, your discouragement will begin to disolve. You will begin to feel more confident and sure of yourself. As this begins to happen, you will become more energized and motivated which, in turn, will make you feel even better about yourself.
In the beginning, you will be aware that you are just "faking it." With practice, it will become more natural and will become a genuine part of your personality. You can now start to transform your personality so you will be the type of person you want to be. It will take time and persistence but it does work.
Dr. Yarnell has produced many self-improvement and personal growth cassette tapes and CDs for adults, teens and children. CLICK HERE to go to his secure, online store.
If you would like to read more about anger management, anxiety, depression, grief, healing, hypnosis, parenting, relationships or self-help, CLICK HERE for Dr. Yarnell's recommended book reading list.
There are two broad classes of factors that determine your win-lose switch settings:
The Inner Factors are vastly more important and powerful than the Outer Factors. No matter how well you master the Outer Factors, unless you overcome any Inner Factors that may be holding you down, you will fail!
To the extent that you handle the Inner Factors, theOuter Factors will become a breeze and YOU WILL SUCCEED!Index of INNER Factors
Negativity and How to Overcome It
"It is far more important to know how to deal with the negative than to be "positive"." -- Martin Seligman ('Learned Optimism')
Learned Helplessness and How to Overcome It
Computer and Internet Basics
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