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Abstract values delivered from one person to another person in friendship or love relationships include: psychologically valuable reflections, philosophically valuable reflections, reflections of each other's values, analytical feedback of thoughts and ideas, mirroring of personal worth, values, and ideas. Tangible and material values include: practical contributions to increasing the efficacy and productivity of the other, practical contributions to reducing or eliminating value-destroying and time-wasting problems and errors inside and outside the relationship, practical contributions to producing tangible and material values to one's self and the other, practical contributions to providing tangible and material values to the other.
Without value-generating interactions, two people are of little direct value to each other -- at least no more value that any two random people might be to each other. Valuable human relationships evolve when two people deliver objective values to one another. That exchange of values measures the value of a relationship.
Aside from the intrinsic value of human life that exists among all people, a person is not a value to others by merely existing. Instead, a person must deliver competitive values to be a value to others and society. Otherwise, that person will be a drain on others and a disvalue to society. And a person must continue delivering values to be a continuing value. Moreover, one must continue adding new values to existing values to experience value growth within one's self and within a relationship. Value growth is a self-created, pyramiding process that requires rational thought and constant effort to sustain. Such a growth process is the essence of human living. For value growth fills life's needs and delivers life's major rewards -- abiding prosperity, romantic love, and happiness.
To fully experience life and sustain value growth requires continuous thought and effort. The need for value growth is not someone's philosophical theory or ethic. That need is an integral part of reality: Constant value growth is required for the conscious organism to function properly. A person makes a disastrous error by failing to put forth the honest, integrated thought and rational effort needed to produce growing, competitive values for others.
Tragically, most people choose to stop their growth early in life. Many stop in childhood -- soon after exerting that mighty learning effort required to read and write. When they stop exerting that effort, they stop growing. The quality of their lives then declines until physical death. ...Without growth, a person cannot experience abiding prosperity, happiness, and psychuous pleasures. Without growth, a person misses the point of conscious life. Without growth, a person dies.
Growth Death is a great, unnecessary tragedy. It never has to happen to anyone; it is imposed on no one. Growth Death occurs only when the victim chooses to avoid the integrated thought and rational effort required to produce and deliver net, competitive values to others. When Growth Death occurs, then all value-based friendships and love relationships stop growing and begin to die.
Now, listen intensely, for I'm going to give you other deep insights about love and then come back around again to value exchange: Both romantic-love relationships and friendships can involve deep psychological and philosophical interactions. But the distinguishing characteristic of a romantic-love relationship is its physical-sexual sharing. That sexual sharing, in turn, offers physical and psychological intimacy unobtainable from any other human relationship. ...Those unique physical/psychological intimacies can lead to growing psychuous pleasures.
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