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After 2001: Our Neotech World



Other abstract values exchanged between two people in a valid love or friendship relationship include psychologically pleasing or enhancing reflections, consistent encouragement especially during difficult times, mirroring various psychological values, understanding feedback of the other's thoughts or activities, and the exchange of practical ideas obtained from each person's unique life experiences.

Sometimes abstract values from a friend or love partner can be beneficially integrated into one's personal life to increase awareness, productivity, and happiness. Generally, abstract values are offered freely, without the thought or expectation of material or tangible payment. In a love or a friendship relationship, no one needs to measure or weigh that natural interchange of abstract values. For that exchange is freely taken and given as a natural, pleasurable, expected part of any good relationship.

Thus, abstract values cannot be used to pay for material values. For material values must always be fairly traded. Material values represent irreplaceable segments of a person's life, effort, and time required to earn those values. Every productive human being needs to trade, not give away, his or her produced values in order to survive, grow, and be happy. If material and tangible values are not traded mutually and fairly, then a portion of a person's life is sacrificed to another person at the expense of both people. As a result of that unfairness, both happiness and friendship decline.

Fairly traded, tangible values do not necessarily mean evenly traded, tangible values. Moreover, a highly competent, nonmystical housewife can through integrated thinking and consistent efforts contribute great tangible and material values to her husband's ability to work more efficiently and effectively, thus, generate more values and income. For that, he fairly trades by providing his wife with tangible and material goods.

Those who misunderstand the nature of friendship or romantic love may try to use abstract values as payment for material values. In doing so, they are exploiting their friendship or love relationships. Such people unjustly extract material values from others for the "privilege" of those others being in their presence. They unilaterally deem their abstract values as payment for tangible and material values. That kind of exploitation, aside from being unjust and parasitical, poisons the relationship.

More important, habitual trading of abstract values for tangible values diminishes that person's ability to produce and deliver tangible values. Such unfair trading leaves that person increasingly incompetent and dependent on others for material or tangible values. ...The potential for friendship, romantic love, and happiness is always the greatest among value-producing men and women who fairly trade tangible and material values in their relationships.

"OK, Zon, I have a tough one for you," my dad stood up and said. "I have run into problems with jealousy before, both my own feelings and then hers. How do I handle jealousy this time? I don't want it to creep into this wonderful relationship. What is the mystic-free voice of Zon on this topic...the powerful voice of fully integrated honesty?"

I identify two types of sexual jealousy: good-thought (GT) and bad-thought (BT). Both types are based on the erroneous assumption that you have a claim on your love-partner's life, especially her sex life.

No one can ever really own another person's life, including that person's sex life. Every individual exclusively owns each and every segment of his or her own life. In relationships, people volitionally share, not own, various aspects or segments of each other's lives. In a romantic-love relationship, by nature, many more life experiences are intimately shared and integrated than in other types of human relationships. Also, while certain segments of a person's life can be temporarily rented or hired as in a voluntary employer-employee relationship, no part of a person's life can be actually owned by anyone else.



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