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Likewise, GT jealousy seldom cuts deeply into the emotions because positive feelings about one's partner dominate the underlying emotions.
BT jealousy, on the other hand, is a destructive, mystical reaction that conjures up, often out of nothing, unjust bad thoughts about one's partner. Those bad thoughts are often well concealed, but insidiously destructive to the emotions of both partners. In contrast to GT jealousy in which good thoughts are retained about one's partner, BT or bad-thought jealousy prevents the jealous partner from knowing, accepting, remembering, or believing the values in the victim partner. Instead, unreal bitterness, cynicism, or malevolence against the victim partner is conjured up by BT jealousy.
Such negative illusions are usually rooted in past experiences not even related to the victim partner. The victim partner usually senses a "bad-person" feedback from the BT jealous person. That causes the victim to respond with increasing puzzlement or astonishment followed by anger, dislike, and a sense of injustice. Those negative emotions usually keep building until they eventually outweigh all the good feelings and values between the partners. At that point, love and the relationship die.
Neotech or fully integrated honesty can overcome both types of jealousy, especially the GT type. BT jealousy is more difficult to overcome because the cause is a cancerous mysticism that becomes deeply rooted in one's emotions. Cognitive-based psychotherapy may help overcome BT jealousy and its destructive effects. Unfortunately, only a minute fraction, if any, in the profession understand mysticism as the prime disease of the human mind and the only disease of human consciousness. The only certain cure is to use mystic-breaking, integrated honesty to self-command all actions. Without that integrated honesty, one will continue reacting destructively to the emotions of jealousy.
Realize, honesty is not automatic. It always requires explicit, conscious effort. Being honest is hard work...very hard work. If, in difficult emotional situations, one is not aware of the concentrated effort required to be honest, that person is probably not being fully honest. At that point, he or she can easily plug into effortless mysticism. For with mysticism, a person can automatically rationalize out-of-context scenarios to avoid the effort required to understand reality and solve one's own problems.
Developing the skills for being honest is neither automatic nor easy. Honesty requires high-effort concentration, discipline, and awareness. Because of the constant effort required to be honest, many people default to mysticism and thus lose the essential tool for solving problems -- the tool for achieving prosperity, power, and happiness. That tool is honesty. ...Many people never grasp or experience integrated honesty.
Fully integrated honesty evolves from the efforts required to be consistently honest. By contrast, mystical dishonesty evolves from self-deceptions and defaults -- from a self-chosen laziness that relegates honesty to a low priority, especially when feelings are involved. ...With mysticism, honesty becomes arbitrary.
"That is a profound thought: being honest is hard work," my father said with a wide-eyed look on his face...like this was one of those moments that would always stay in his memory as a mental videotape.
Indeed, being honest is hard work, especially in difficult emotional situations such as bouts with deep-rooted jealousy. Realize, however, no value judgment can be made on emotions alone. Only the choice to react rationally or irrationally to an emotion can be judged good or bad. The judgments I am making here are based on jealous reactions, not jealous emotions. The choice to act rationally in avoiding a jealous reaction will help dissipate that harmful emotion. But the harmful, irrational choice to react jealously always feeds and amplifies that emotion.
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