by Frederick Mann -- 10/1/07 (under construction; first version should be completed in about 2-3 months.)
(Note on word usage: Some political words, like "government," "state," "country," "nation," "law," etc., may not represent reality very well (they are often used to mislead) -- see Political Fakery? and the "Concept Formation" and "Does the government really exist?" videos. However, it would be difficult to communicate without using such words, so I'm using "government*," "state*," "country*," "nation*" and "law*." The "*" is the equivalent of crossing my fingers, to indicate that I may be using a "fake word.")
"According to most studies, people's number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death. Death is number two. Does that sound right? This means to the average person, if you go to a funeral, you're better off in the casket than doing the eulogy." -- Jerry Seinfeld
"It is not rejection itself that people fear, it is the possible consequences of rejection. Preparing to accept those consequences and viewing rejection as a learning experience that will bring you closer to success, will not only help you to conquer the fear of rejection, but help you to appreciate rejection itself." -- Bo Bennett
Fear of rejection may be a most important element of helplessness. It may be one of the most important components of the Helplessness Context and of Core Helplessness. (Both Fear and Helplessness may operate as as "Negative Override Programs" that prevent upgrading.)
GetAltitude.com - Keys To Success 1 of 7
Underneath the "fear of public speaking" may be the fear of rejection. Being rejected by one person is painful enough. But, if you speak in public, you could be rejected by a large group. That could be superpainful!
From The Guardian, Friday October 10, 2003:
"How scientists proved that the pain of rejection is all too real"
"...[T]o the brain, a social snub is just like stubbing a toe.
Brain scans carried out on volunteers showed that when they suffered a social snub, the brain's "pain centre" went into overdrive. The finding suggests that any emotional stress, such as the demise of a relationship or the loss of a loved one, might be far more closely linked to real pain than previously thought."
In the above video, Eban Pagan refers to the notion some people have that there's something "wrong" with selling -- that somehow salespeople are engaged in a disreputable, degrading, or demeaning activity. If you have any such notions in your head, consider the possibility that they constitute "bad software" that you may want to upgrade.
Also consider the possible psychology behind some people saying that selling is "bad." They suffer from fear of rejection. Therefore they fear selling (and probably deny their fear). The defense mechanism is to deny their "bad software" and keep it in place by saying, "Selling is bad."
Most people may have fear of rejection "deep in their genes." In ancient times, human survival depended largely on being part of a group. If you were rejected by your group and kicked out, it usually meant quick death. So most people may have a deep-seated fear of rejection. From a capture-bonding perspective, being rejected equals dying!
In the book Get Out of Your Own Way: Escape from Mind Traps, Tom Rusk, M.D. covers a number of "mind traps" relevant to motivating yourself to take the massive action necessary for success:
The two books by Susan Jeffers, Ph.D. Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway and Feel the Fear ...and Beyond may be useful for those who allow their fears to demotivate themselves.
Subjecting yourself to the fear of rejection is an example of bad brain software!
How to Overcome the Fear of Rejection: The Successful Rejection Experience
by Jonathan Robinson, MA, MFT
When I was seventeen, I was very shy - especially with attractive women my own age. By the time I was a freshman in college, I had only been on two dates. Driven by teen-age hormones, I really wanted to meet and go out with some women, but I was terrified of being rejected. My fear was like a prison, keeping me locked away in self-imposed loneliness. One day, I vowed I would overcome my fear.
I decided that the only way I was going to become free of my fear was to plow my way through it. I enlisted the help of a good friend to make sure I had the motivation to face my fright head on. I gave my friend $50 and told him, "Don't give me this money back unless I get rejected by ten different women by the end of today." I figured that by experiencing ten rejections, I would know what it felt like and my fear would lessen. The money I gave to my friend would help me stay motivated to complete my mission.
I strolled down to the University Center to seek out attractive women. As I approached the first woman, sweat was literally dripping from my forehead. My knees began shaking, and as I said "hello," my voice cracked. When the teen-age girl turned and saw me shaking and sweating, she worriedly asked, "Are you all right? Do you need me to call an ambulance?" She thought I was having an epileptic seizure. I assured her she didn't need to call an ambulance, and that I'd soon be okay. A brief, awkward conversation ensued before I finally mumbled, "Would you like to go out together sometime?" In a kind voice she responded that she had a boyfriend, but that she was flattered that I had asked. As we parted ways, I took out an index card from my pocket and marked down one rejection. Then, as I thought, "Only nine more to go," I began to breathe again.
Fortunately, each rejection got easier. In fact, I soon noticed that the women I spoke to seemed more nervous than I. My rejections were proceeding rapidly and smoothly until the seventh woman I approached. When I asked her for a date, she said, "Sure." I hadn't thought of the possibility of someone saying "Yes," so I said, "Sure what?" She finally convinced me she really wanted to go out with me. I wrote down her number, and in a state of happy amazement, soon asked another woman for a date. To my surprise, she also said "Yes." By this time, I was feeling totally at ease while I asked women out, and they frequently responded by giving me their phone number. In fact, after a while I had so many dates that I had to begin acting like a jerk in order to fill my quota of ten rejections (and get my $50 bucks back). After I had received eight phone numbers from various women, I managed to get my tenth rejection. In one magical hour I set up my love life for my freshman year and put a big dent in my fear of rejection.
From this experience I surmised that the key to overcoming one's fear of rejection is to set it up so that getting rejected is seen as a success. My actual goal was to get ten rejections, and only by doing so would I be rewarded by getting my money back. As I faced my fear, I saw that it wasn't so bad. I could survive. Since I was fully prepared for what would happen, it didn't seem like a big deal anymore. I noticed that with each and every rejection, it got easier. In addition, as my fear went away and I became more relaxed, I was often rewarded with an unexpected "yes."
Perhaps there is some area in your life in which the fear of rejection has kept you from moving forward. Maybe you've made success too important. Instead, try rewarding yourself for just making an effort and getting a "no." For example, you might decide to get three "no" responses to your sales calls each day, or one "no" per week from potential dates. My guess is that you'll survive. In fact, you'll probably get some unexpected "yes" responses along the way.
If doing an exercise like this strikes you as too difficult or scary, then you're probably a good candidate for it. To make it a bit easier for you, you can begin by asking someone to lunch who would not normally be your first choice for a date. After all, if they say "no," it won't matter to you so much. Once you've built up your "ability" to be okay in the face of rejection, you'll be better prepared to approach people who you really want to spend time with. Ultimately, the ability to face rejection is one of the most important skills a person can learn in order to create both personal and business success. [emphasis added]
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Jonathan Robinson is a professional speaker and the best-selling author of Shortcuts to Bliss, Communication Miracles for Couples, and Shortcuts to Success: the best ways to master your money, time, health and relationships. He offers free articles about success in relationships on his web site: http://www.howtotools.com .
His email address is jonathan@howtotools.com
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As Eban Pagan indicates in the above video, you may be able to overcome your fear of rejection by joining Toastmasters and learning and practicing public speaking. I highly recommend this.
You could also try Brain Chemistry!
Idenics is an effective and efficient technology you may be able to apply to overcome fear of rejection as an "unwanted condition" -- see Some Relatively Simple Solutions for Some?
You may also want to check out Coping.org's section on Handling Fear of Rejection.
For fear in general, see Coping.org's sections on Overcoming Fears, Handling Fear of Success, and Overcoming Perfectionism (related to fear of failure -- "Because a perfectionist is often burdened with an extreme fear of failure, the person can become immobilized. With no energy, effort or creative juices applied to rectify, improve, or change the problem behavior in the person's life, he becomes stagnant.")
There's a very powerful mantrum you can use to aid you in overcoming your fear of rejection: "It doesn't mean anything!" or "It means nothing!" Whenever you experience rejection, you can remind yourself that "It doesn't mean anything!" or "It means nothing!" or "It has no meaning." (The fact is that, from your perspective, you create all the meaning in the universe. It may take months or even years for you to fully realize this, because practically all humans are "habitual unconscious meaning creators." If you persist in using your "no-meaning mantrum," you will eventually make some major success breakthroughs! See The Automatic Meaning Destroyer.)
It's also possible that your fear of rejection is at least partially rooted in "deep imprints." Some "deep imprints" may be pre-verbal, i.e., recorded before you acquired verbal skills. If this is the case, "verbal approaches" may not be sufficient to completely overcome your fear of rejection. More on this aspect in Core Helplessness.
"Action may not always bring happiness; but there is no happiness without action." -- Benjamin Disraeli
"The path to success is to take massive, determined action." -- Anthony Robbins
(Acknowledgment: This section has been adapted from an email by Cristina Munoz.)
Let me start off with something very simple and obvious.
The first key to success is simply to take action.
Sounds simple, I know. If you've been the King or Queen of "I'll Get To It Tomorrow"... then you may want to go straight to How to Beat Procrastination.
Think about it...
My point is simply this...
If you think of or see something you want, then you MUST take action to get it!
Not Tomorrow... Today really is best... yes indeed... no better time than right now!
Successful people also take Massive, Determined Action.
Unsuccessful people sit on the sidelines.
Now, what are you going to do?
If you haven't been successful up till now, you either haven't taken action, or you've taken the wrong actions. You may also have taken one or two of the actions in a series of actions necessary for success, but you haven't followed through with all the actions you need to take.
In order to be able to take the actions necessary for success, there may be things about yourself you need to improve or fix. I've identified helplessness as a fundamental reason why many people fail. If this applies to you, then you may have to take massive, determined action to overcome your helplessness, probably starting with your brain chemistry. If fear of rejection is a major component of your helplessness, then you may have to take massive, determined action to overcome your fear of rejection.
In order to take the correct actions to become more successful, you may have to become more competent. You may have to acquire knowledge and skills you don't now have. It may require massive, determined action on your part to raise your competence to a level where success becomes possible -- see The "Success Threshold."
If you've been unsuccessful, then the chances are overwhelming that you've been lazy (not taking action), incompetent (taking poor actions), and/or helpless (incapable of taking action). If you deny your laziness, incompetence, and/or helplessness, then you may need to take massive, determined action to get some people around you to give you feedback. (According to Robert Maurer, P.D. in One Small Step Can Change Your Life: The Kaizen Way: "...[O]ne of the most solid predictors of success in life is whether a person turns to another human for support in times of trouble or fear.")
For some people, poor health may be a basic factor behind their lack of success. Poor health may be related to helplessness. If you're in poor health, you may want to take massive, determined action to improve your health.
You don't have to suddenly shift from no action to massive action. You can get going by applying The Small-Step Progression Principle.
"It is easy to dodge our responsibilities, but we cannot dodge the consequences of dodging our responsibilities." -- Josiah Charles Stamp
(Acknowledgment: This section has been adapted from an email by Cristina Munoz.)
Take responsibility for EVERYTHING (you absolutely can and should).
I call this the "Ouch Success Secret"...
Because speaking personally, I [Cristina Munoz] had my head in the sand when it comes to this one for quite some time.
In fact, if you know my personal story, you would know that I injured my back seriously, and I'm embarrassed to admit that for the first year I had a major "self-pity" party.
Anyway Frederick, It was "poor me" everywhere I went.
And I blamed everyone except myself and the fact I was behaving like a victim was not helping me in any way, shape, or form.
It wasn't until I snapped out of it and took a good, long look in the mirror to face up to the part I played in causing what happened to happen, that finally I was able to begin turning things around.
Yes believe it or not Taking Responsibility for EVERYTHING... [you absolutely can and should] is a good thing.
A good rule of thumb is to take responsibility for everything you can control. Hopefully, you don't deceive yourself about what you can and can't control.
Here is another True Story to show you why. A well-known (very successful) Internet-marketing guru was holding a workshop in a hotel in Atlanta. Each of the students had paid about $5,000 to be there and were expecting to have their websites set up before the end of the 3-day workshop.
At the beginning of Day #2 of the workshop the Internet connection in the hotel went down!
What did the Internet-marketing Guru Do?
Well Frederick, obviously the fact that the Internet connection went down was not his fault, but he took responsibility for it anyway.
Why?
Because if you take responsibility for something you have the ability to change it.
If you blame others, then you are totally helpless.
The Internet-marketing guru rented a bus and took all 50 students to his office (some 40 miles away) and the class continued.
Although it wasn't the easiest solution in the world, he did it anyway... and everyone in the class got their websites up and running before the class ended.
The point of this story is to drive home the point that if you take responsibility you can change things.
You're responsible for all the meaning you experience in the universe -- see
Take responsibility for your life, finances, your health, etc... And now that you know that YOU are the one in control you now know that YOU have the ability to create the kind of success you've always desired!
See also: Responsibility.
"Develop the winning edge; small differences in your performance can lead to large differences in your results." -- Brian Tracy
"Champions keep playing until they get it right." -- Billie Jean King
"You have to learn the rules of the game. And then you have to play better than anyone else." -- Albert Einstein
In January, 2001 (I think) I first published my article "The Winning Edge." One night in a Las Vegas casino, a stranger walked up to me and said that he'd seen me in several casinos and I always seemed to be winning; could I teach him how to play? Without missing a beat, I replied, "Sorry. I'm just like everyone else; sometimes I'm lucky and I win; sometimes I'm unlucky and I lose." He could have been a casino shill or detective. In a Las Vegas casino you also never know who's watching or listening. You don't want the casino personnel to think that you're a professional. Generally, they hate people who can beat them.
To consistently take money from Las Vegas casinos, you need knowledge, techniques, and skills that give you a winning edge. In blackjack you can get a winning edge by counting cards, and by some other methods based on the non-random ways they stack and shuffle cards.
Money management is very important. If you overbet -- bet too much in relation to your bankroll -- the odds are high that you'll lose in the long run, even if "technically" you have a winning edge. In February, 2002 I published "Playing the Odds." This reflects the kind of mindset and approach to money management that constitutes part of a winning edge.
Although I no longer get involved with such very-high-risk programs (HYIPs and Surfs), the principles of getting a winning edge, money management, and taking money off the table still apply.
One of the most important skills that can give you a winning edge is your marketing ability -- see Internet Marketing for Beginners & Professionals.
Before deciding to become a doctor, you need to decide whether you're willing to invest the effort and the training time it takes to qualify (move above the "success threshold") as a doctor. You need to make an assessment of the preparation involved. Similarly, to become a successful online moneymaker, you may want to make an assessment of the necessary preparation. Then you need to decide if you're willing to do what it takes to become qualified.
Your winning edge is part of what moves you above the "success threshold." 98%ers typically don't have a winning edge. They do little or nothing about getting a winning edge. 2%ers take "massive, determined action" to acquire a winning edge and increase it.
Getting a winning edge is "your responsibility." Hopefully, you can find some more answers in this Report.
The easiest "solution" is to decide to remain a 98%er for the rest of your life! Otherwise, Simpleology may be the simplest solution for you. However, if you suffer from Low-Level Moods Associated with Helplessness, Simpleology may be useless to you... until you first "Upgrade Your Brain Chemistry!"
There may be a fundamental decision for you to make. Decide whether you have or can develop the capacity to advance beyond remaining a 98%er for the rest of your life. It may be appropriate for you to do a relatively simple job where you're told what to do. 98%ers can survive reasonably well doing relatively simple jobs with bosses who tell them what to do.
In making your decision, you may want to consider the "Peter Principle" -- Google "peter principle" to find out more. If you attempt to escape from the ranks of the 98%ers, you may be trying to "promote yourself to above your natural level of competence." Your inherent level of competence may be such that you're only suited for a relatively simple job with a boss who tells you what to do. If so, it may not be appropriate for you to try to promote yourself to "above your natural station."
If you decide to remain a 98%er for the rest of your life, then there's no need for you to read any further.
There's a "success methodology" called Simpleology. The first part is Simpleology 101 and it's free. Study Simpleology 101 and aplly it to become successful at whatever it is you want to achieve. If you achieve it within a reasonable period of time, then you're probably not a 98%er and you can ignore the rest of this article.
If you find that Simpleology 101 doesn't help you to achieve success within a reasonable period of time, then you can safely assume that something not covered in Simpleology 101 is preventing your success, or there are things about you which prevent you from applying Simpleology 101 to become more successful.
At this point I suggest you consider two main possible areas to explore in order to raise your level of success:
If you decide to tackle Competence, then you could check out:
The above three items could lead you to identify something you want to focus on. You could then go back to Simpleology 101 to see if you can now apply it to become more successful.
If you feel overwhelmed by what you might need to do to become more successful, you may want to apply The Small-Step Progression Principle. If you feel you lack the personal power to do what you need to in order to become more successful, then I suggest you focus on "Upgrading Your Brain Chemistry."
Check out the EFT videos. You can learn the basic technique in a few minutes and start using it to handle issues, problems, and/or unwanted conditions in your life. You can download a free EFT Manual from the Emotional Freedom Techniques website. If you have issues you can't handle with EFT, then Idenics may be your best option.
It's possible that you're "Stuck in a Helpless-Identity." You may be able to utilize Idenics to "become unstuck." Idenics is a very powerful methodology to handle and overcome "Unwanted Conditions" in your life. Core-Helplessness could be one of your "Unwanted Conditions."
Typically, when you start with Idenics you make a list of your "Unwanted Conditions." Then you identify the "Identities" at the root of each "Unwanted Condition." An "Identity" is a fixed way of being or behaving. People tend to get "stuck" in certain "Identities," resulting in less than optimum (if not unworkable) behavior that results in "Unwanted Conditions."
You can check out Idenics at their website. You're also welcome to call Mike Goldstein for a free consultation on his toll-free number, 1-800-IDENICS (433-6427), anytime, day or night. If he's not available at the time of your call, leave a message with your name and phone number, and he'll be sure to get back to you quickly. For those out of Mike's calling area who cannot reach him on the toll-free number, feel free to call him collect at 1-303-695-4940. Tell him Frederick Mann referred you.
(Note: As a result of the First Big Inversion -- see Addicted to Unhappiness -- some people become addicted to THE NEGATIVE. When you do Idenics, some of the "Negatives" may get onto your list of "Unwanted Conditions." But there may be a subtle trap here. At a deep level, the "Negatives" you're addicted to may be "Wanted Conditions" for you! The First Big Inversion is a phenomenon of confusing THE NEGATIVE with THE POSITIVE, resulting in THE NEGATIVE becoming "Wanted!" It seems quite likely to me that, because of the First Big Inversion, some people who do Idenics will exclude from their list of "Unwanted Conditions" certain important "Negatives." Becoming acutely aware of your mood levels -- together with a study of Addicted to Unhappiness may assist you in adding to your list of "Unwanted Conditions" some important "Negatives" you might otherwise exclude.)
After you've done some Idenics and handled your "Unwanted Conditions," including Core-Helplessness if applicable, go back to Simpleology 101 and attempt to apply it to become more successful.
If you still find yourself unable to apply Simpleology 101 to become successful, check out "THC." If you like what you see and hear, buy the THC package. Get your THC coach to read this article. Then have him or her guide you in handling any deep imprints that affect you adversely.
After you've practiced THC to whatever degree you deem necessary, go back to Simpleology 101 and attempt to apply it to become more successful.
(Note: An option is to do "THC" before you do Idenics. Two other options to check out are ThinkRightNow! (right column) and Overcome "Success Anorexia".)
If after trying both Idenics and "THC", you find you still can't apply Simpleology 101 to become more successful, contact Dr. Arthur Janov -- see Core-Helplessness Mentality (CHM).
I'll make an attempt to organize a team of people with the appropriate expertise to study Primal Healing and possibly develop highly effective and efficient ways to treat CHM and to bring about "Core-Power Mentality" (CPM). More on this under Core-Helplessness Mentality (CHM).
If we can figure out the basic methodology to "persuade people to upgrade" -- in addition to the incalculable benefits to humans -- this may become one of the greatest breakthroughs of all time!
A "big opportunity" is available to anyone who can come up with the practical and effective means for "normal humans" (particularly 98%ers) to "upgrade their brain hardware/software." This opportunity stems from the fact that the vast majority of humans operate with "brain hardware with debilitating biochemistry," as well as "ancient/primitive/obsolete/destructive software" in their brains, particularly in the form of "imprints that reduce their personal power."
Currently, nobody I know of is providing humans in general with effective means to "upgrade their hardware/software." (There are many philosophies, brands of psychology, self-improvement gurus, books, workshops, etc., but nobody I know of comes even close to doing an adequate "upgrade job." A major reason for this is most likely that nobody provides effective and efficient means to confront, handle, and overcome helplessness.)
Think of the modern PC. Think of the first PCs about 20 years ago. Think of the difference between the first PCs and modern PCs as an "opportunity gap." With his role in the software upgrades that helped advance the first PCs to the modern PC, Bill Gates became the richest man in the world. (I realize that Gates/Microsoft may have a "use-every-dirty-trick-we-can-get-away-with" policy and that some Microsoft products have security and other weaknesses, so this is neither an endorsement of Bill Gates nor of Microsoft products.)
Many "modern humans" are stuck with "ancient/primitive/obsolete/destructive software" in their brains. Much of this software is passed on from generation to generation. (Parents, politicians, preachers, teachers, and the media play major roles in perpetuating this "dead-end human software." See "human domestication."
In James P. Hogan's science-fiction story, Voyage from Yesteryear, the children of Chiron were raised by computers/robots so they weren't brainwashed the way practially all "modern humans" have been.
Based on Hogan's SF story and my comprehensive reasearch into "the ways humans go wrong" -- particularly my identification of Core-Helplessness as a central issue that needs to be handled first by most people -- some major breakthroughs in "human upgrading" may become possible.
The "opportunity gap" between where most humans are and where they could be is vastly greater than the "PC opportunity gap" Gates utilized to become the richest man in the world.
If effective and efficient means can be developed for people to confront, handle, and overcome their helplessness -- and figure out the basic methodology to "persuade people to upgrade" -- in addition to the incalculable benefits to humans -- this may become one of the greatest breakthroughs of all time!
"Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge" -- Charles Darwin (1871)
"...People tend to hold overly favorable views of their abilities in many social and intellectual domains. The authors suggest that this overestimation occurs, in part, because people who are unskilled in these domains suffer a dual burden: Not only do these people reach erroneous conclusions and make unfortunate choices, but their incompetence robs them of the metacognitive ability to realize it." -- Justin Kruger and David Dunning
You may have seen the TV show American Idol. You may have noticed some contestants who think they are great singers, but in reality are nowhere near as good as they think they are. To many of the hopeful contestants it's beyond understanding that the judges reject them. Some of them get so offended by the judges' feedback that they insult the judges. Sometimes judge Randy Jackson says to a contestant: "If you want to improve, I suggest you take lots of singing lessons." Then judge Simon Cowell, with an "expression of severe pain," says: "Sorry, you would be wasting your time and money; you have no talent; you just can't sing!"
Many contestants have convinced themselves that they're "the next American Idol." If you ask them how they would rate their singing ability on a scale of 0 to 10, they would probably say, "9 or 10." But in reality their accurate rating is 0 or 1. There can be a huge difference between where some people think they are and where they really are. On occasion Simon Cowell has said to a contestant: "OK, let's go to the beach. You sing to some random people, and they can tell you how good they think you are." Typically, the feedback is pretty negative.
Several psychological studies have indicated that many people tend to overestimate their level of competence -- they think they're better than they really are. Some people, in some areas, may overestimate their level of competence dramatically -- like the American Idol contestant who thinks she's a 9 or 10, when she's really a 0 or 1. The less competent people are, the more dramatically they tend to overestimate their level of competence.
Some psychologists call this phenomenon "denial of disadvantage." Most American Idol contestants are at a huge disadvantage because of their vocal incompetence. Typically, they deny their disadvantages -- they cannot face the fact that their chances of success are zero. They cannot understand why the judges tell them to go home. For more information on this phenomenon, do a Google search for "denial of personal disadvantage."
Consider an "online moneymaking scale" with a range of -10 to 0 to +10. If you've been trying to make money online for some time, and broken even (overall neither made nor lost money), then you can rate yourself as "zero." If you've been earning $1,000 a month, you could rate yourself at "1." If you've been earning $10,000 a month or more, you could rate yourself at "10." If you've been losing money, then you should rate yourself with a negative number, depending on how much you've been losing.
Your rating is a measure of your online moneymaking competence. You may have to be brutal with yourself. If you rate yourself at a level of zero or below, you may be on a path that makes success impossible. This may apply to the 98-99% of people who fail in their attempts to make money online. If you're currently on a path that makes success impossible, it's very important that you realize this. It may be the first step in opening the door to enable you to shift to a new path where success becomes possible.
In Internet Marketing for Beginners & Professionals I provide a "scale of online marketing skill levels":
Above, you can replace "Marketing" with "Moneymaking." If you've been trying for some time to make money online, and you've had no success -- and particularly if you've been losing money -- then one of the best things for you to realize may be that you're at the level of IMB - Internet Moneymaking Baby --the equivalent of babies who can lie on their backs, cry, smile, wave their hands, and wiggle their toes, but cannot yet crawl!
At the time they wrote their emails to me, G.C., CHM (right column), PWS (right column), RT (right column) were all at the IMB - Internet Moneymaking Baby level... or even lower!
I highly recommend that you Check Out the Complete Scale.
Looking over the 98%er Characteristics may also help you determine where you really are.
You may also want to check out the Packer Factor and Programmed for Mediocrity.
You absolutely should check out the Mood Level Table. Upgrading your mood level may be the best place to start, if you want to become more competent.
If you've been operating below the success threshold, then it's up to you to take whatever actions necessary to Upgrade Yourself to Above the Success Threshold!
You can live your life more productively by creating a Core-Power Context, applying the Power Success Formula and utilizing the "Core-Power Context Creating Questions":
#1: As the Creative Force of my Life, How do I Use My Brain and My Power of Choice to Decide What Actions to Take -- and How Do I Take these Actions ... -- to Control ... and Influence ... in Order to Produce ... ?
#2(a): What's the Most Important Negative I can remove from my life, in the shortest time, with the least effort?
#2(b): What's the Most Important Positive I can add to my life, in the shortest time, with the least effort?
#3: What Can I, and How Do I, Learn from My Experiences?
#4: What Knowledge, Skills, Techniques, and Resources Can I, and How Do I, Acquire (Them) to Become More Successful?
The distinction between context and content is very important. Think of a bowl of soup. As long as the bowl remains stationary, the soup can be thought of as being "fixed in a steady state" and can't move by itself. If you stir the soup with a spoon, you set it in motion. But when you remove the spoon, the soup returns to its former fixed steady state. Think of the bowl as context and the soup as content. Context holds content in place.
I learned this from Werner Erhard of "est" -- see #TL03D: Scarcity to Abundance; Poverty to Prosperity; Limited to Unlimited Thinking. According to Erhard, world hunger is a "content" held in place by a "context."
An important principle is that there are many cases where "content" can't be changed, unless you first change "context." Stirring the soup doesn't bring about any lasting change, because when you stop stirring, the soup returns to its former state. "If you want to change the soup, you first need to change the bowl!"
This is related to most diets not working. Think of appetite as context and eating as content. Someone goes on a diet and eats less (changing content without changing context). This is like stirring soup, without changing the bowl. If appetite remains unchanged, the dieter will eventually, most likely, abandon the diet, go back to the "old eating" and gain back whatever weight was lost. Appetite trumps or overrides diet; context trumps or overrides content.
If a dieter undegoes bariatric surgery (gastric bypass or lap band), appetite (context) is effectively changed, and it becomes much easier to eat less (content). If a "magic pill" could be developed that reduces appetite, it would become much easier for overweight and obese people to lose weight and keep it off. Similarly, a "magic pill" that speeds up metabolism and fat burning, would make it easier to lose weight and keep it off. The "magic pill" would operate at the level of context. (You can Remove the Feeling of Hunger!)
Another important principle is that negative contexts tend to override or trump positive contexts. There are all kinds of machines and systems where one broken thing causes the entire machine or system to stop working. If your heart stops, you die, no matter how healthy the rest of your body is.
If you suffer from a Core-Helplessness Mentality (CHM), and "deep helplessness imprints" are part of the cause, then you have to handle and overcome your CHM before you're likely to become significantly more successful. If your heart is weak and at risk of stopping to beat at any time, then you have to first get your heart fixed to get healthy again.
If you have a Core-Helplessness Mentality or a Helplessness Context, it's virtually impossible to create a Core-Power Context. In general, you have to remove the negatives before you can implement the positives. (To give a car with a broken engine a new paint-job, won't make the car run better. You have to fix the engine first!)
(Adapted from an email by Dave Vallieres of "Fail-Fast.")
When I see 1,000 different people selling AdWords, eBay, AdSense, SEO and BLOG information I get this overwhelmed feeling. I feel like I'm drowning in information and instead of actually making money -- I'm too busy trying to keep up with all the latest marketing fads...
The good news is you don't need to know all the newest fads... You really don't... Internet marketing is no more complicated than offline marketing.
You need 3 simple components:
(1) A good program or product
(2) A good offer
(3) A good list.
But the simplicity of actually making money is complicated by one thing: FOCUS.
From my discussions with hundreds of entrepreneurs, it appears they do not know how to make decisions about marketing and business in general. They have no framework for making important decisions - how to weigh the pros and cons of any decision, and the ability to make decisions quickly. [See 80/20 Principle and Boost Your Decision-Making Skills.]
Most people wait to make a decision until they have all the information available... and they postpone important decisions because they do not have all the facts.
Well, guess what? You'll NEVER have all the facts.
The ability to make decisions quickly even when you do not have all the available facts is the hallmark of a true entrepreneur... and it's a skill you need to develop, if you want to succeed. It's part of my "Fail-Faster" philosophy.
You have to make the best decision possible, and make it quickly, even if you do not have all the facts, if you want to be successful.
Then take ACTION... [Massive, Determined Action, as necessary].
Tests and studies have shown that even wrong decisions, if acted upon, can make you successful, if you use a "course-correction" strategy.
Course-correction strategy is simply the ability to be flexible after a decision is made and acted upon, but appears to be off target, so that you can get back on track by learning what went wrong so you can correct your course of action as you move your business forward. [See Progression/Learning Loop.]
Think of it this way: Sailing vessels never get to their destination if they are tied up on the dock... but once they get going they can "correct" their course if a strong wind or currents take them off their target... you can do the same thing!
Making a decision, then taking action is more important to your success than doing nothing because you're waiting for all the facts. Even if you're wrong, the process of decision making and taking action is critical to your overall success.
It's more important to DECIDE and ACT, then correct your actions as you go, rather than postpone a decision and never act.
Make it your mantrum to "DECIDE then ACT!"
You'll be more successful than you ever thought possible...
A "Cycle of Action" consists of three parts: Start, Do/Change, and Stop [Acknowledgment to L.Ron Hubbard].
A major consideration -- as in the case of helplessness -- is whether or not there is something that needs to be fixed first, before other actions can be fruifully started.
Another major consideration is to understand and appreciate what you can control and what you can't, so you reduce the chances of starting actions that are extremely unlikely to work out.
It's most important to select actions that are likely to produce the most beneficial results. The 80/20 Principle can be used to identify actions with the most productive potential.
It's very important that you start the actions you determine you need to take. Then it's very important to follow up and continue. You continue the cycle of action until it's complete and then you stop.
To give yourself the best chance to start an action and keep going, it may be worth applying the Small-Step Progression Principle. You may also want to be sure that you Swing Your Bat! and that you Raise Your "Quit Threshold" as necessary.
Be sure to learn (rather than dyslearn) from both positive and negative experiences and outcomes -- check out the Progression/Learning Loop and the Regression/Dyslearning Loop.
Do not allow procrastination to stop you from starting or continuing until an action is complete.
Assuming that you don't have too many negative obstacles remaining, you can now proceed to create a Core-Power Context.
Power can be defined as the ability to do work and/or influence people in order to produce desirable results.
I have identified the following as the most important elements of power:
Core-Power Context Creating Question #1: As the Creative Force of my Life, How do I Use My Brain and My Power of Choice to Decide What Actions to Take -- and How Do I Take these Actions ... -- to Control ... and Influence ... in Order to Produce ... ?
You live your productive life as a Quest out of the context of the above general question, or a similar one. You can replace the "...s" with whatever appropriate to produce the Desirable Results you want. The Quest means that everything is open to question and improvement.
The Creative Force element is covered in:
The How do I Use My Brain element is covered mainly in:
The My Power of Choice element is covered in:
The Decide What Actions to Take element is covered in:
The How Do I Take these Actions element is covered in:
The Control element is covered in:
The Influence element is covered in:
The Produce Desirable Results element is covered in:
Core-Power Context Creating Question #2:
(a) What's the Most Important Negative I can remove from my life, in the shortest time, with the least effort?;
(b) What's the Most Important Positive I can add to my life, in the shortest time, with the least effort?
For most people -- particularly 98%ers -- it may be more productive to first remove the most serious negatives, particularly if they involve a Helplessness Context and/or Core-Helplessness Mentality. While you're the victim of certain serious negatives, it may be unlikely that trying to add positives will work very well. Think of a seriously ill athlete. He first focuses on recovering from his illness; once recovered, he focuses on improving his running.
See also:
Core-Power Context Creating Question #3: What Can I, and How Do I, Learn from My Experiences?
Core-Power Context Creating Question #4: What Knowledge, Skills, Techniques, and Resources Can I, and How Do I, Acquire (Them) to Become More Successful?
Realize that YOUR BRAIN IS YOUR GREATEST ASSET! At least, it's POTENTIALLY your greatest asset. Many people use their own brains more to sabotage than to aid their success. I emerged from school with a mind PROGRAMMED FOR MEDIOCRITY! The same may apply to you. I highly recommend the book Simple Steps to Impossible Dreams: The Fifteen Power Secrets of the World's Most Successful People by Steven K. Scott. He writes in terms of Six Chains that hold you back and Seven Booster Engines that take you forward. Here are the "15 Power Secrets":
You may want to use Simple Steps to Impossible Dreams: The Fifteen Power Secrets of the World's Most Successful People by Steven K. Scott as a foundation for your own Core-Power Context. However, it may be appropriate for you to Raise Your Mood Level and handle some other "Chains" not mentioned by Scott, e.g.:
Once you've "broken" your "Chains" (as necessary), you can start your "Engines!" and Take Off! (For more on Scott's book, see Programmed for Mediocrity.)
"Jack Arthur Johnson, often called "Lil' Arthur" and the "Galveston Giant" by his contemporaries, became heavyweight champion of the world in 1908. In so doing he destroyed the colored barrier by stopping Tommy Burns in 14 rounds to become the first black heavyweight boxing champion. He had a 10 year unbeaten streak during which time he defeated all of the top fighters of the period. [emphasis added] He fought the other highly avoided black fighters of his day, including the clever master strategist Joe Jeannette 10 times, the hard punching Sam McVey 3 times, and gave the great Sam Langford a beating in their only meeting. His championship reign covered the years 1908-1915 when the giant "white hope" Jess Willard finally defeated him." -- Monte D. Cox (Jack Johnson, The Galveston Giant..."Master of Ring Science")
Muhammed Ali on Jack Johnson
We are very fortunate to have a role model of a "near-perfect 2%er" in the name of Jack Johnson. You can find out more about him from the book Unforgivable Blackness: The Rise And Fall Of Jack Johnson, by Geoffrey C. Ward. A two-part documentary on Johnson's career by filmmaker Ken Burns was aired on PBS during 2005.
Jack Johnson was born in 1878 in Galveston, Texas. His parents were former slaves. Despite all the disadvantages of poverty and discrimination, Johnson became someone who succeeded bigtime as a heavyweight boxer. For several years, the top white boxers wouldn't fight Johnson because they were scared of him. Their excuse was that "they didn't fight blacks." Nevertheless, Johnson triumphed and became world champion. It's remarkable that a child of former slaves could develop a Core-Power Mentality (CPM) to the extent that Jack Johnson did.
Nobody or nothing could "domesticate" Jack Johnson! He also didn't seem to suffer from the consequences of "capture-bonding."
In terms of CPM, Jack Johnson was very advanced. Particularly remarkable about this is that Johnson grew up during racist times when some Blacks were lynched merely for whistling at a white woman. Many Whites treated Johnson with racist contempt, including in hundreds of newspaper cartoons. He was attacked viciously in the media because an "inferior Black" was not supposed to beat "superior Whites." Johnson rose above it all.
"At a time when whites ran everything in America, he took orders from no one and resolved to live always as if color did not exist. While most Negroes struggled merely to survive, he reveled in his riches and his fame. And at a time when the mere suspicion that a black man had flirted with a white woman could cost him his life, he insisted on sleeping with whomever he pleased. Most whites (and some Negroes as well) saw him as a perpetual threat -- profligate, arrogant, amoral, a dark menace, and a danger to the natural order of things.
The real Jack Johnson was both more and less than those who loved or those who hated him ever knew. He embodied American individualism in the purest form; nothing -- no law* or custom, no person white or black, male or female -- could keep him for long from whatever he wanted. He was in the great tradition of self-invented men, too, and no one admired his handiwork more than he did. All his life, whites and blacks alike would ask him, "Just who do you think you are?" The answer, of course, was always "Jack Johnson" -- and that would prove to be more than enough for turn-of-the-twentieth-century America to handle." -- Geoffrey C. Ward
It was as if Johnson had read The Ego and His Own by Max Stirner, understood and integrated it, made it his own, and implemented it in all areas of his life.
"Why he insisted on acting that way [essentially never accepting any limitations on himself] remains the essential mystery of his life... He was especially close to his mother, who told him again and again he was "the best boy in the world" and assured him he could do anything he wanted if he wanted it badly enough [emphasis added]... He saw himself as someone special from the first -- someone set apart, not subject to the limitations holding others back." -- Geoffrey C. Ward
Jack Johnson was an outstanding example of someone largely free from the effects of "capture-bonding" and "human domestication". (Much later in South Africa, Steve Biko identified as the biggest problem of blacks that in their own consciousness they regarded themselves as "inferior creatures" ("captees") -- see Human Domestication.)
Johnson either removed all notions of "inferiority because of being black," or never had any such notions in the first place. But Johnson went further, in the tradition of Max Stirner, he seemed to have removed all notions of subservience (capture-bonding and human domestication) from his mind. Reportedly, Johnson was kicked out of church for stating that God didn't exist and the church was a domination over people's lives. It seems clear that Johnson didn't accept that anybody or anything had the right to be a domination over his life.
As a result of the Second Big Inversion it's much easier for pretended "authorities" (captors of all sorts) to control, dominate, and exploit their subservient victims (captees). It seems to me that Johnson either never became a victim of the Second Big Inversion, or he was only a "minor victim."
Another important factor may have been "education." Johnson had only five years of "formal education." He may have been mentally strong enough to not get brainwashed by his teachers -- see "Are Our Schools Concentration Campuses for Mind Destruction?" -- you could also Google "John Taylor Gatto."
Most "modern subservient humans" (could include both 98%ers and 2%ers) have little or no awareness of how they have been domesticated and how certain imprints in their heads diminish them and render them relatively helpless. Johnson's CPM was so strong that he understood this very well:
"In 1929, long after his [Johnson's] boxing life had ended, he cooperated in writing a series of syndicated articles about his career. In one, he argued that the outstanding black heavyweights of that era, Harry Wills and George Godfrey, would never reach the heights he [Johnson] had reached, in part because they were from the Deep South and therefore "grew up with the thought implanted in their minds, through generations of tradition, that the COLORED man was not equal to the WHITE. The inferiority complex which was planted in their grandfather and his father has never been shaken off and never will be shaken off."" -- Geoffrey C. Ward
Johnson must have been quite an advanced thinker. He was also an inventor. On April 18th, 1922 he was granted U.S. patent# 1,413,121 for improvements to the wrench.
Johnson must also have had an "unstoppable desire for success!"
To succeed you need to desire success. It needs to be a very strong desire. You may have to "turn up your desire several notches." Hope for success is not good enough... not even close. You need a burning desire!
Make a list of what your life will be like when you enjoy success -- however you define or describe your success. What are the benefits of your success?
Make another list of what your life would be like as a failure -- however you define or describe failure. How is experiencing failure different from your current life? What are the disadvantages of any failure(s) you might be experiencing now?
You also need a strong belief that you can succeed. How can you create such a strong belief? (You may first have to overcome CHM!)
From time to time you may want to return to this Step to gauge if your desire and belief have become strong enough to make success possible.
Note that desire and belief are not enough for success. You'll also need to take action. You may have to acquire knowledge and skills... and develop yourself in other ways.
I've adapted the following from an article by Mike Dillard of Magnetic Sponsoring called "Desire Can Only Take You to California":
"What kind of difference does it make?
The old way = 5 Years and $15,000 down the drain. Waiting tables and trying to avoid my friends that came in to eat. Tons of debt. Tons of frustration. No money. No respect, and no downline. [CHM/Victim Mentality?]
The right way = Hundreds of reps and $250,000 in business in 4 months. New truck. Loaded $61,000 Mercedes convertible. 1.5 acres on a golf course. New freedom. New life. [CPM/Champion Mentality?]
And you know what the nuttiest part to this whole thing is... The RIGHT WAY, IS TEN TIMES EASIER than the old way. [This may become true, only once you've overcome CHM.]
No more selling. No more cold calls. No more heavy-handed recruiting.
This wasn't luck and it wasn't a miracle. I simply started educating myself and learning new skills...
I started spending every spare dime on MYSELF and my education..."
Frederick's comments: During the 5 years when Mike Dillard "earned" negative $15,000, he was probably on a path that made success impossible. Then he realized that he needed to change course -- make a dramatic shift to a path that makes success possible -- "I started spending every spare dime on MYSELF and my education..."
During a TV appearance, legendary investor Warren Buffett was asked what he regarded as the most important thing people could do to become more successful. He said that you, yourself, are your own greatest asset; the more you invest in yourself, the better!
Chances are -- particularly if you've been less successful than you desired -- that there's been a "beast voice," or "failure voice," or "automatic thoughts" telling you things like:
You have the power to defeat and override your "failure voice." To learn how to do this, go through the "Addictive Voice Recognition Technique®" Crash Course. If you've already done it, do it again! The more times you do the course the better!
You have power of choice or free will. (Some materialist philosophers argue that there's no such thing as "free will" -- it's an illusion. They're mistaken. There are circuits in your brain that make free will possible. Circuits that enable you to at least partially control your thoughts. Circuits that enable you to understand things. Circuits that enable you to ask questions. Circuits that enable you to pause and think before you respond automatically. Circuits that enable self-observation and learning -- you can monitor your own thoughts, observe your actions and the results you produce, and learn from them. These circuits make consciousness, free will, and responsibility possible.)
To the extent that you let it, your "failure voice" overrides your power of choice and free will. You can beat and demolish your "failure voice" by repeatedly doing the "Addictive Voice Recognition Technique®" Crash Course.
The following is largely based on an article by Mike Dillard of Magnetic Sponsoring called "If There Are 10 Secrets to Success, This is #1":
This section is largely based on the book The Path of Least Resistance by Robert Fritz. Its theme can be summarized as:
How to orient your life so the path of least resistance automatically leads you towards producing the results you desire in life.
The fundamental principles (with my own insights added) can be summarized:
Energy flows along the path of least resistance.
"... [T]here is a direct connection between what occurs in your consciousness and what occurs in your external life... if you initiate change internally a corresponding change will happen externally."
Humans are like rivers and tend to automatically follow the path of least resistance.
The path of least resistance is determined by fundamental underlying structures. These structures could be described as programs in the brain -- special programs with a pervasive influence. They also include paradigms or worldviews.
We can change the fundamental underlying structures of our lives. The ability we apply to do this is Power of Choice - the most powerful human ability.
Two radically different life-orientations can be distinguished:
(a) The reactive-responsive orientation, characterized by reacting and responding to events and external conditions -- could be called the "victim-orientation," though there are many situations where reacting/responding to circumstances is vital for survival;
(b) The creative orientation, characterized by you being the predominant creative power in your life -- could be called the "champion-orientation."
One of the essential differences is that in the creative orientation you initiate any desired change by changing the contents of your brain, while in the reactive-responsive orientation you attempt to change conditions outside yourself, without changing the contents of your brain.
One of the most important aspects of the reactive-responsive orientation can be called "overcoming resistance" or "changing the system." You attempt to apply a stronger force to overcome an opposing force. You attempt to launch into battle with a better system to overpower a weaker system. Imagine two opposing fists. If one fist pushes harder, the opposing fist tends to react by strengthening its own resisting push -- the stuff wars are made of!
In the reactive-responsive orientation you experience yourself being at the effect (or mercy) of external circumstances, that is, more or less helpless. In the creative orientation you experience yourself at cause over (or in control of) external circumstances, that is, powerful.
In the reactive-responsive orientation your feelings and emotions may be the predominant factors that determine your actions. In the creative orientation your choices are the predominant power and you do what you choose, sometimes in spite of how you feel. Though you still regard your feelings as important messengers.
In the creative orientation you focus on the result; the process for achieving the result is secondary; "what" precedes "how."
The basic manner in which you reorient your life is to make fundamental choices. According to Fritz, "a fundamental choice is a choice in which you commit yourself to a basic life-orientation or a basic state of being." Here are some of the fundamental choices I have personally made:
(a) I choose to be the predominant creative power in my life. (b) I choose to create and enjoy an exceptional degree of freedom. (c) I choose to increase my power and express it creatively and effectively. (d) I choose to be healthy, fit, loving, and wealthy. (e) I choose to be true to myself and to develop and achieve my full potential. (f) I choose my positive, creative, and powerful frame of mind. (g) I choose to create the abundant energy that empowers my actions. (h) I choose the powerful actions that produce the results I want. (i) I choose to devote my life to personal freedom and power, and the solution of world problems. (j) I choose to link up with like-minded free, creative, and powerful individuals.
Interestingly, after reading The Path of Least Resistance, I realized that in 1986, when in very poor health (including severe heart disease), I did make the fundamental choice to be healthy. I completely reoriented my life in respect of health and changed my diet and life-style drastically. Today I'm superhealthy and moderately fit. I have no heart problems. I have not spent any time being ill in bed. When I get a cold I usually recover completely within 10-15 minutes. From flu I usually recover in about 3-4 hours. Some years ago ago I ran up Camelback mountain in Phoenix in a time in minutes which is less than half my age in years. I doubt if there are a hundred people in Phoenix who can do that.
At the time when I made the fundamental choice to be healthy, I also had to make certain primary choices concerning diet and life-style. At the time it seemed completely impossible to me that I could live up to these choices, so much so, that I often experienced despair. Nevertheless, I was able to remain true to my choices -- and produced results way beyond what I had thought possible. The choices I had made changed underlying structures so the path of least resistance automatically led me to do what was necessary to achieve superhealth and fitness.
This demonstrates one of Fritz's dictums: what you choose does not depend on what you think is possible.
In addition to fundamental choice, Fritz identifies two other kinds of choices: primary choice and secondary choice. A primary choice is a choice about a major result, an end in itself, for example, "I want to live in a $250,000 house. A secondary choice is one that supports a primary choice, for example, "I will save $25,000 for a down payment on my house."
The difference or gap between current reality and your choices establishes structural tension. Structural tension seeks resolution and generates creative energy...
The Pivotal Power Formula
Fritz describes a "pivotal technique" you can apply when circumstances are not to your liking. I have renamed it "the pivotal power formula":
The Path of Least Resistance by Robert Fritz is by far the most valuable book in my personal library. I know of no book I can recommend more highly.
The Action Shift Power Formula
I have developed a formula you can apply at the action level. It will help you become more aware of when you sink into the reactive-responsive orientation. It may increase your power and creativity phenomenally.
Often you will be amazed by the difference between the quality of the action from step 1 and the quality of the action(s) generated during your sleep. The power of the path of least resistance at work!
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